I never thought I would find myself sitting down to write about my dating life or lack thereof. But I did promise to be more raw and personal on the blog this year so here goes nothing.
I believe it was a Tuesday night ( as Taylor Swift would write in a song) when Cram ( not his real name) caught my finger mid left swipe. I accidentally left swiped but shook my phone so hard so I can get a backtrack swipe. His profile popped back up again and it was who I thought it was. See, I had actually met this guy a few weeks prior in a café line- we talked about croissants or donuts and I had sworn that he was too coward to make a move . Is Bumble giving us another chance, I thought ?! I swiped right and BAM! it was a match. I knew he couldn’t talk first on the app but I also hoped that he would be smart enough to use the time extension on me. He wasn’t that smart so I didn’t initiate convo and the match disappeared 24 hours later. Fast forward three days..guess who I find in the same café ? Yup, same ol’ Cram. We awkwardly joke about how we matched and he finally asks me out.
If someone ghosts you and is still Facebook friends with you or watches your social stories, please do not try to prove your worth to them. I have been guilty of this in the past but it leads nowhere.If a person is not interested, he/ she is not interested. Period. Nothing you can do will change that and if you have to prove your value to someone , they are not right for you. Trust me the right person will know your value and will cherish and respect that about you.
Sadly, our generation has been fooled into believing that perfection is attainable. Is it on instagram? #Maybe. Real life though? Nah, not attainable. Never has been, never will be, and, yet we are all looking for that perfect individual. No matter how unrealistic our expectations are, the disappointment we feel when they aren’t achieved is very real. Ghosting will only become a norm with every new app making easier to access the ” plenty of fish in the sea”. With more options, we tend to put more pressure on ourselves to make the perfect choice. Even when we choose well , we end up disappointed because we are convinced that we can do better. I’ll end this coffee talk on a positive note: Karma never ghosts. Not even you, Cram.
Until next time!